A day with the Sun

I was sitting under a bare sky, it was a tiring day and last night. Fell asleep in the arms of those comforting warm breeze. That was the most peaceful sleep I've ever had!

Waking up to the relaxing noise of those chirping birds, just before the sunrise. It was so mesmerizing that I was barely able to notice anything but that rising sun. Those orange sunbeams peaking off the messy clouds, felt like an excited child is just about to burst into happiness, into joy. I was feeling guilty, a drop of tear rolled through my eyes thinking how dumb I was to find amenity in people while this enormous pile of comfort was waiting to be seen, just a close window apart.

Sitting there like an old man, who has achieved everything, who has lost everything, one who is done with life. Sitting looking at the sun and the changing clouds and that red-orange-blue sky, as if it was my last day. Like a thirsty Camel, I was stocking it as much as I can. Just was filling my eyes with this beauty, I guess rolling tears were making more space for it.

It was so steady and peaceful. The sun was right above my head and I was stunned by its ability to spellbind me without saying a single word, unlike that annoyingly loud clatter I'm tired of hearing. Sitting stunned didn't even realise it changing, though it was 6hrs different. The clouds were making sense, funny face one moment and just nothing the other moment. I even failed to notice this varying train of expressions on my face, while normally a single thought used to shake the whole idea of peace. Changing my face to the other direction, looking towards the light felt better than sitting facing the dark and the dull. It was warm, hazy, but those sturdy locked eyes of mine were making me feel like living in a different universe altogether. Just like how somebody's hug melts all the misery down to nothingness, feels just like existing in a different universe far away from those miseries.

It was cold, the light was fading, & I didn't even notice it happen, felt like the Sun was shielding me from its hazy evil side by hiding behind those distorted clouds itself, watching such a mighty Sun taking shade into clouds flashed a thought how even an uncontrollably powerful Sun feel comfortable among those shapeless clouds, even a mess it be. Watching it set into the ground, a tear rolled over my cheeks, this time it was not of guilt, or discomfort, not of a feeling of wasting my time for the wrong thing, or not for missing something I could have done either, no! 

This time it rolled off of happiness, of how contained I was feeling, my eyes were feeling how unable I am of expressing this divine emotion/experience, how unable I am of not living this ever again. The setting sun in the horizon with a couple of sunbeams peaking off the ground, for a while it felt like they were waving me goodbye, felt like they were happier than I am, for putting warmth in my heart, a moment of comfort in my life. With eyes full of hope and dried tears, I waved them back.

With the absence of that beauty, all the things I shielded to feel were hitting back, I was tired. It was a challenge, one I was giving up on, to hold my body, my self up for another moment. A nerve hit me hard, felt like I have no control over my body, let it be on its own, setting it free, thinking of past hours I've spent witnessing the nature at it's finest. With a sharp smile, I closed my eyes, hoping waking up in heaven thereafter.

-Sakib Tamboli
A Story Teller

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Well, that was all, but there's little more to this story, that person had Parkinson's Disease. He was tired of his life, he was supposed to die with a restless mind, burdened heart and choices he regrets.
Reading to this story before mustn't have touched that deep, try reading it again, knowing his misery, his shapeless clueless body. I'd make a perfect sense now :)

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